Category Archives: Independence

Invest in Yourself

Jonathan Robinson, Finding Happiness Posted on by

Having just paid my taxes, I got to thinking about how we spend money in this culture.   It ends up there are some proven ways to spend money that make people happier. For example, when you spend money in ways that bring you shared enjoyable experiences with friends or family, it ends up you get a lot of “happiness bang” for your buck. It has also been shown that spending money on material possessions—like a nice car or house—has little effect on one’s level of happiness. Why is that?

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Studies show that when we spend money on possessions, our level of happiness goes up—but only for a short period of time.   We soon get used to the nice car or house, and it fails to bring us any new joy after a surprisingly short period of time.   As an example, a friend of mine just spent a year and tens of thousands of dollars remodeling her house.   When I asked her two months after the house was done if she was thrilled with the results, she said, “I hardly notice it anymore.”

Since we work hard to earn our money, it’s important to consider what is the best way to spend it in order to maximize our happiness.   One approach to spending money to maximize happiness is to do what I call “investing in yourself.”   Investing in yourself means spending a certain percentage of your income on improving your life’s skills and becoming a happier, healthier, and a more peaceful person.   Since wherever you go, you take YOU with you, it’s a good idea to make sure you’re always improving on the YOU that is interacting with the world.

3747008363_217c5214ebIn my own life, investing in myself has made a huge difference. I used to be a depressed, shy, and suicidal teenager. Yet, at age sixteen, I decided to take 5% of whatever money I earned and use it to invest in myself.   Over the years that has meant buying self improvement books, going to therapy, taking courses on meditation, going to workshops, and buying all kinds of health products. My life now is incredibly rich and blessed—largely because I am now a much more expanded person. By investing in myself and my skills over many years, I have now achieved a level of peace and happiness I could not have imagined before.

We are always making investments in our future. We plan vacations, buy possessions, pay for college for our kids, and invest in our health. But do you regularly invest in your continual improvement and ability to really enjoy your life? If not, then your life will likely be no better five years from now.   Therefore, I encourage you to put aside a certain amount of money each month or each year just to improve your skills, expand your happiness, and invest in your ability to find true inner peace.

If you think I can be of any help in that endeavor—through therapy, coaching, or my “Deeper Happiness” course, I would be honored to be of service…images-1

Let’s All Celebrate Anti-Independence Day

Jonathan Robinson, Finding Happiness Posted on by

 

fireWe’ve all celebrated Independence Day.  I say it’s time we graduate from that teenage like holiday and start celebrating Anti-Independence Day.  Perhaps we could call it Interdependence Day. The July 4th holiday and the American cult/culture it helped create celebrates our desire to be and do whatever we want.  That’s a good start.  Yet, that’s not the end of our journey, just like being a teenager is not the end point of a person’s maturity level.  The truth is that we live in an interdependent world, and if we hope to make the world a better place, we need to acknowledge that we’re all in this together.

Before becoming mature adults, teens need to first assert their independence.  But the goal for a teen is to not stop there.  A middle-aged person still partying and being reckless like a teen is not a pretty sight.  But isn’t that what we’re doing?  The U.S.A. has been around for well over 200 years, yet we’re still proclaiming we’re the greatest and we don’t need anyone else.   Immigrants? We don’t need them.   The poor?  Let them fend for themselves.

Like a cancer that grows at the expense of the body that supports it, too much of a focus on “me” and my wants can be bad for the human body—or the human race.  In an age when even our phones and tablets start with the pronoun “I,” what we need is a little more “we.”

On a practical level, what would this look like?  It might look like people deciding to forego more hours at work for more time with their family– or volunteering at a soup kitchen.  It might look like being kinder to your neighbor or your co-worker.  After all, if we truly are interdependent, then what goes around comes around.

As a happiness “expert”

I find it interesting that the number one way to quickly boost one’s happiness involves asking yourself a simple question.  The question is, “What act of kindness can I do for a stranger or a friend today?”   Since we truly are all connected, when we acknowledge that fact by an act of kindness, we actually feel happier.

So I propose we celebrate Interdependence Day. We could make it on July 5th—right after Independence Day.  Just as High School follows Middle School, Interdependence Day would represent a graduation from the mindset that we once needed to survive, but are starting to outgrow.  On Interdependence Day, instead of shooting off fireworks, we could practice acts of kindness.  By doing that, we’d feel better, our beneficiaries would feel better, and we’d be making a statement that we are indeed all connected.