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Monthly Archives: February 2013

How to Easily Manage Your Mood

Jonathan Robinson, Finding Happiness Posted on February 25, 2013 by Jonathan RobinsonJanuary 16, 2023

Relaxing to musicWe all want to experience deeper peace in our lives, or simply have more joy. As a teacher of workshops on happiness, I’ve looked for quick ways to help people quiet their minds and/or enjoy more fun and play. Of the many different things I’ve tried, I’ve found one formula to be so simple and effective that I heartily recommend it to everyone. I call this method The Magical Playlist.

In essence, the Magical Playlist is simply an iTunes playlist of songs created for a specific purpose. By creating playlists dedicated to certain moods, you can easily have access to some of your favorite feelings — with hardly any effort. After all, your personal favorite songs have the ability to move you into your heart, uplift your spirit, and help you feel a depth of peace.

A man named Frank came to see me complaining of marital difficulties. As he entered my office, it was clear that he was very tense. He told me that his wife was fed up with him because of how stressed he was from his job as an air traffic controller. When he went home each evening, he’d spend the first three hours in front of the tube–just trying to unwind from his job. By the time he started to feel a bit relaxed and sociable, his wife was ready to go to bed. After asking him some questions, I learned that he enjoyed classical music. I suggested he make a playlist of his favorite classical works, and listen to a couple of songs in his car before entering his house each evening. When he returned to my office the following week, he told me that his wife reported, “You’ve become a new man.” Apparently, ten minutes of classical music helped Frank unwind much more effectively than three hours of TV. By the time he walked into his house each night, Frank was relaxed, refreshed, and emotionally available for his wife.

For many people, music is an easy and amazingly effective way to become centered. I’ve coached many of my clients to carefully choose the type of music to play before key events in their life. Before an important presentation, they might choose a favorite rock ‘n roll song. Before a romantic night on the town with their mate, they may choose a favorite love song. Before a time of meditation or prayer, they may choose some New Age or quiet piano music. By knowing what mood you’d like to “get into,” and choosing an appropriate piece of music to assist in that process, many people find they can successfully manage their moods much more effectively than ever before.

ipodOf all the possessions I own, my iPod is my most treasured. By listening to certain songs, I have almost immediate access to any feeling I want—without any cost, and no known side effects! When making certain playlists, I looked through all the songs I have on my computer, and carefully selected songs that have always had the most impact on me. Nowadays, I have special “mood altering” playlists categorized in five different ways: First, songs that put me in a fun and happy mood. In this category, I have songs like “Twist and Shout” and “I Wanna Hold Your Hand” by the Beatles. It’s hard to sing along with such songs without getting a smile on your face. Try it and you’ll see what I mean.

Second, I have a playlist dedicated to meaningful, mellow songs that help put me in my heart. In this category, I have songs such as Kansas’ “Dust in the Wind.” By putting a lot of heart-oriented songs in one playlist, I have a guaranteed way to calm down and feel contemplative when I feel so inclined. Third, I have a playlist of my favorite instrumental songs. Sometimes I just want to quiet my mind, and heartfelt instrumental music can often do the job even better than a time spent meditating.

BluesonStreetMy fourth “magical” playlist includes songs that make me feel energized and motivated. These are songs I like to shout to, like Bruce Springsteen’s “Born to Run,” or U2’s “Vertigo.” After shouting to a couple of songs on this playlist, I feel like I can tackle anything. Finally, I have a playlist of songs that make me feel all lovey and mushy inside. These songs are great to listen to before you spend time with your mate or a date.

After a five to ten minute vacation with some of your favorite music, your mind will be clearer and your soul more soothed. With hardly any effort at all, you’ll find that you can transcend a nasty mood—or simply a stressful day. You’ll end up being able to better handle whatever life throws your way. The hour or so it takes to put your initial playlists together will be amply rewarded by countless hours of peace, love, and energized enthusiasm. It’s an amazingly effective investment in your well-being…

Posted in How to Be Happy, Inspire Me Today, Key to Happiness, Mood | Tagged easy, experience, finding, fullest, happiness, Jonathan Robinson, joy, life, manage

I’d Love to Inspire You Today!

Jonathan Robinson, Finding Happiness Posted on February 19, 2013 by Jonathan RobinsonJanuary 16, 2023
Inspire Me Today

Inspire Me TodayI am very excited to share some great news with you. Today, I am the featured Inspirational Luminary on InspireMeToday.com, which allows me to share some of my wisdom with people around the world.

The Inspire Me Today website features “useful ideas” of a new Luminary every day, and I am honored to be chosen as one of them. On this site, you can read a brief article on a specific idea meant to inspire you and be truly useful in your life. Other Inspire Me Today picks have included Sir Richard Branson, Guy Laliberte, Seth Godin, Neale Donald Walsch, and many more.

Please visit the site on February 21st, 2013 and help me inspire the world. If my traffic and comments break records, InspireMeToday.com will share my content with millions of additional people too! I hope you’ll check it out, leave a comment and share it with your friends. To help you stay inspired, they also provide 3 minute ‘Today’s Brilliance’ pick-me-ups each day by email, by RSS feed or in an iPhone app.

From the folks at Inspire Me Today and from me, thank you in advance for your kind support. Together we really can inspire the world.

Be inspired,
Jonathan

Posted in Being Present, Inspire Me Today, Jonathan Robinson, Positive Psychology | Tagged finding, fullest, happiness, inspire, Joonathan Robinson, joy, life, love

Charming Your Partner

Jonathan Robinson, Finding Happiness Posted on February 14, 2013 by Jonathan RobinsonJanuary 16, 2023
Couple under Hearts tree

I have a question for you: for $500, could you make your partner feel upset in under one minute? Most people answer an emphatic “Yes!” To accomplish this, you would probably bring up some event, person, or question that invariably irritates your partner. We even have a term for this–“pushing my buttons.” When someone pushes our buttons, it is commonly accepted we have no choice but to get upset. Over time, our partner usually learns where all our “buttons” are.

While “pushing my buttons” signifies a way our partner can easily make us upset, we have no phrase for the opposite effect–when our mate does something that invariably makes us feel loving. We could call it “pushing my love buttons,” but there’s no poetry in a phrase like that. I prefer to call it “charming my heart.” When someone “charms” us, it’s as if they have cast a spell of enchantment over our heart. A wonderful way to experience more love in your relationship is to learn of “automatic” ways to charm your partner’s heart. When your partner feels fully loved by you, guess how they’ll treat you? Soon, you’ll both be charming each other’s heart in an upward spiral that leads all the way to heaven. Ahhh, how sweet it can be!

couple beach sunsetThe way we tend to express love to another person is, in most cases, the way in which we would like to receive it. I have fallen into this trap. I used to give my wife massages because that’s what makes me feel loved. Even if a gorilla gave me a massage, I’d feel totally loved. My wife used to frequently tell me she loved me because that’s what she wanted to hear. When people are unaware of their partner’s preferred ways of feeling loved, they end up expending a lot of energy that goes unappreciated. Yet by knowing exactly what helps your partner feel safe and loved, it becomes infinitely easier to create intimacy on a consistent basis.

There is a simple exercise you can do with your partner to find out how best to “charm their heart.” Have him or her become comfortable in a chair, and then say the following: “Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and begin to think of a specific time you felt really loved by me. Remember that time as clearly as you can. Remember where we were, what we were doing, and exactly what happened that let you know I really loved you.” Give your partner a minute or so to fully re-experience such a moment. Then proceed, “What was most important in letting you know I fully loved you? Was it something I said, or the way I looked at you, the way I touched you, or something else? What exactly helped you to know that I really loved you?” Listen carefully to what your partner says, because the answer(s) to this question can transform your relationship.

couple beach shadowBy knowing how your own heart is charmed, you can reveal this important information to your partner. Try the previous exercise on yourself, or have your partner read it to you. You may be surprised to discover exactly what your partner does that creates a warm feeling of safety and love in you. Once your mate knows how to help you feel loved, they can more easily and consistently show you they care.

Every time you charm your partner’s heart, you’re making a “loving deposit” in to your “shared love account.” Your shared love account is like a bank balance you share together. When things are going well, there’s a lot of love put into “savings.” When both of you consistently make deposits into your shared account, you feel abundantly in love. It’s much easier to handle problems when there’s an abundance of love in your love account. Therefore, make frequent deposits of love in your relationship account by charming your partner’s heart. Remember to do the little actions that make a big difference in how your partner feels. It will immediately help both of you feel wonderfully intimate, and when problems arise, you’ll have plenty of love “banked” to help you ride out the storm.

Posted in Healthy Relationships, How to Find Happiness, Inspire Me Today, Jonathan Robinson, Mood, Positive Psychology | Tagged charming, experience, fullest, happiness, joy, life, partner

Jonathan’s Happiness Blog

Jonathan Robinson, Finding Happiness Posted on February 8, 2013 by Jonathan RobinsonJanuary 16, 2023

Happiness Photo

You’ve probably figured it out – I’m writing a blog! But NOT one of those useless blogs where people blab about stuff you already know or don’t care about. It’s a blog dedicated to “Useful Stuff” such as how to be happier, less stressed, more peaceful, and live life to the fullest. From my 10 books and the many seminars I teach, I get a lot of feedback as to what people find truly useful. That’s the type of stuff I plan to elaborate on in my blog.

Since I assume you’re as busy as I am, I’ll keep my blog posts short and chalk full of practical suggestions. I’ll also try to make you laugh and entertain you with my crazy antics and stories. If all goes according to my scheme, you’ll read my blog as an inspiring break from your day, and be motivated to try little “experiments” to make your life even more enjoyable and adventurous.

Thanks for reading what I have to say….
Jonathan Robinson signature

Posted in How to Be Happy, How to Find Happiness, Jonathan Robinson, Key to Happiness, Positive Psychology | Tagged fullest, happiness, joy, life

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